Brenda (Wiener) Phillips Obituary

We are sad to announce that on August 2, 2021, at the age of 82, Brenda Phillips of Parsippany, New Jersey, born in Newark, New Jersey passed away. Leave a sympathy message to the family on the memorial page of Brenda Phillips to pay them a last tribute. You may also light a candle in honor of Brenda Phillips.

She was predeceased by : her parents, Judge David and Blanche Wiener. She is survived by : her husband David; her children, Robert (Annmarie) of Parsippany and Elise (Jeff) of Livingston; and her grandchildren, Jessica, Katelyn and Danny.

As you all know, Brenda was an incredibly special person. She was an only child and never tired of making friends. A stranger was a friend she hadn’t met yet. She amassed them and received dozens of birthday and holiday cards.

From waitresses and salespeople she encountered to members of her inner circle, she was a great listener who always cared and dispensed sage advice.

She was also very funny, and we had many laughs. She was a great audience, too. Her joy for life was contagious. Wherever she went, everyone adored her and her honed, dry sense of humor.

One of Brenda’s trademarks was her treasure trove of key chains and other little chachkies that she distributed to people who she thought deserved a little reward. People were shocked, sometimes confused, and flattered when she handed them a cute pen or whatever and said, “You’re sweet, I want you to have this.”

She’d mass-produce quiches and bring them to her doctors and friends. When our longtime dentist retired, I met his successor who asked me, “Is your mom really as nice as she seems?!” No one had ever tried to confirm that before.

His follow-up comment was, “What did you bring us? Your mom always brings something.” Tough act to follow.

She really knew how to work a room. One of her party tricks was astrology. Sometimes she’d guess someone’s sign and was usually correct. Other times, she’d pull out a book and look up a couple’s compatibility for them. People loved it!

When I posted about her passing on Facebook, over a hundred people who knew her responded with “I love her,” “What a wonderful & generous person.” and statements like that.

She had the most amazing memory for people-related things and often recalled events from my past that I had long forgotten.

Brenda was so giving that multiple people considered her their best friend. As her granddaughter, Jessica observed, “The world needs more Brendas.”

Forty years ago we visited a relative at a cemetery and saw a headstone that read “A Friend to All.” She told me she wanted that on her headstone.

Everywhere I went with her, people told me how fortunate I was to have such a wonderful person as my mother. She had a profound effect on others who appreciated her interest in them and her ability to make everyone feel special and comfortable.

Here’s an example of how compassionate she was, in addition to bringing people meals, driving them to doctor appointments, food shopping for them, visiting them at the hospital, etc.

A year or two ago, she began telling me that I shouldn’t be upset when she passed away because she enjoyed her life. Imagine having the foresight to prepare your child emotionally for your demise?

She noted that she loved her family, had great friends, enjoyed many outings with both groups, and traveled with her parents and also as an adult.

Losing her is devastating, and she leaves an enormous void in the world. It’s rare to find so much warmth, caring, and generosity in a person. All we can do is cherish our memories and maybe do something kind for someone in her honor.