Thomas Andrew Calder Obituary

We, the family of Thomas (Tom) A. Calder are heartbroken by his recent passing. Tom's gallant struggle with cancer finally ended on Tuesday, December 5, 2023 in Calgary, Alberta. True to his character, he lived life on his terms, and kept his dreams of a bright future in his heart, even in those last few days as he struggled to maintain hope that he could be well again. Despite spending much of the last few years in and out of appointments, treatment, and the hospital, he never lost his sense of humor and playful sarcasm.

Throughout his entire journey, he took things in stride, cracking jokes with his family and healthcare team. He had a great ability to make others smile and his sense of humor will be missed.

Tom was born in Halifax, Nova Scotia and spent his early years in Timberlea. He played hockey through his childhood and high school years. He lived most of his life in Halifax, where he met Pam in 1979 - they were married 34 years. Later, he would take up squash with a singular focus - an activity and community that brought him great joy, challenge and comfort. Tom also loved to cook, especially for others, cycling through his trusted favorite recipes and new, interesting culinary challenges. After Nic moved to Calgary, Tom and Pam would visit - more recently, Tom shared Nic and Sam's enthusiasm in developing a piece of land in Cape Breton - he was a proud dad.

Tom was a man of many ideas, who loved a new challenge; he was a problem-solver and a story-teller, always excited to chat and reminisce. He was gregarious, always liked meeting new people; he was a hard worker. He invested in relationships with others, from his business to friends he shared hobbies with. He loved being in any kind of garden, especially in the last few years - whether among flowers in his Dartmouth garden or in the gardens at Nic & Sam's Calgary home.

His passion, above all, was caring for and being with his family who were friends and his friends who were family. In the quiet moments shared with those closest to him, he would often state that he was the luckiest person on the planet to be loved and appreciated by those he touched, however briefly.

He is survived by his wife, Pam D. Etheridge Calder; his son Nicholas (Nic) Etheridge Calder (Sam Deng); his brothers Alfie (Edie) and Billy; and in-laws Helen, Lennie, Leonard (Mary), Doris (Lane), Wilson (Sue), Wade (Phyllis), Mike and his many nieces and nephews whom he so adored.

Tom was predeceased by his dad, Alfred Calder; his mom, Ruby (nee. Downey), his parents-in-law Palmer and Edith; his sister, Susan, his sisters-in-law Bea, Pat, Carol and brothers-in-law, Jim, Stan and Nicky.

As for us, we believe he would want you to know that he put his heart and soul into his family, friends, his hobbies and his business ventures. Tom was a man of contradictions - both singularly focused and scattered, deeply open / loving and wildly stubborn, extraordinarily confident and wrestled with self-doubt - but unquestionably, he loved each and every one of you, who made Tom's life "a work of art".

Tom requested his ashes be dispersed partially in the Rocky Mountains, where his parents' ashes were scattered, and to the Atlantic Ocean. Details will be finalized and shared in the new year for a memorial occasion at each location, and shared for friends and family to help remember him and honor his memory.